Young men who have sex with men's (YMSM) experiences coming out to family: Implications for family-based interventions

Purpose: Increasing awareness of sexuality-related bullying and suicides highlight the need to provide safe environments for YMSM. Although families often serve as a primary source of safety and support, YMSM's access to these resources may be compromised during their coming out process. In order to inform family-based interventions for YMSM, we explored YMSM's family reactions to their disclosure of their same-sex attractions using Family Systems Theory. Family Systems Theory posits that families make decisions that reflect how they integrate societal values into their family identity.

Methods: We conducted 30 in-depth interviews with YMSM living in Michigan (ages 18-24; 16 Whites, 11 Blacks, & 3 Latinos; 5 HIV+). Interviews were audio-recorded, transcribed, and coded for themes related to family using inductive and deductive coding.

Results: YMSM narrated heterogeneous and contradictory experiences of acceptance and rejection during their coming out process. We noted that family reactions were linked to several themes, including masculinity norms, life course expectations (e.g., marriage, children), and family obligation (e.g., “You're my son, so I love and support you no matter what.”). Religious and sociopolitical (i.e., progressive vs. traditional) identities also served as the basis for family reactions, and often reinforced the aforementioned social norms.

Discussion: Consistent with Family Systems Theory, family members' responses reflect their struggle to reconcile their expectations, values and identities during the coming out process. Based on our findings, we discuss potential family-based strategies that may be embedded into mental health services and youth development programs for YMSM or other LGBT populations.